Gift of God

"My songs, my praises to God."

It all started when I was still young, perhaps when I started to talk. According to my family, people around me started to notice that I could get the right tune of the song I'm listening to every time I sing along with the radio or recorded tapes. Then it all continued until I started going to school. The very first song I ever learned and memorized is Celine Dion's "It's All Coming Back To Me Now" all because of my aunt. My aunt sings well and she started to give me basic lessons  but I never really tried to practice it like making it a daily habit not until I started to join local singing contests. The very first was with my school (elementary). The very first piece I used was the nationalistic song "Dakilang Lahi". The contest was some sort of nationalistic because it was held during the celebration of Buwan ng Wika. Unexpectedly, I won. That's when my mother and people around tried to convince me into joining other singing contests but I never really wanted it. Why? Because I was this timid young girl who never wanted to present myself in front of a large audience especially when they're all strangers to me. (Well I think everybody has their own experiences regarding that matter.) For me, singing back then was just a hobby or an interest. It never came to me that I "could" sing for real. My very first vocal coaches were Christina Aguilera and Mariah Carey. Oh no, don't get me wrong. I never met them in person. What I meant was that I had their tapes back then and I used to sing along with them and try to imitate what they're doing with their voice. Then I turned 10. Every year, our town is celebrating the feast of St. Guillermo (the town's patron saint) and is holding an amateur singing contest. I joined and got the first runner up place. From then on, everybody knew that I could sing and I continued to join school singing contests until high school. Luckily, I already won few trophies and prizes but I'm not always at the top. And every failure became my disappointment and until then, I have never believed in myself. I only got a seed of confidence. I never changed. I've always been that girl who sings with her legs shaking but still I have always dreamed of becoming a popular singer someday.

But everything changed when I met and encountered God and I think that's what made me become who I am today.

I have come to know God's purpose why He gave me this one special gift -- the gift of music. Currently, I am a worship leader in our church and have been part of the music ministry for four years already. But things did not go the way I wanted it. Life has been tough. Been through lots of hardships as I live my life to serve God with the gift He gave me. The enemy was there, always there to distract me but as I continue to walk I have seen how great and faithful God is in spite of me having those stumbling blocks along my way. One of the greatest struggle was that of being asthmatic. There were times when I already asked the Lord to take my life because of the pain I am feeling whenever I am having those fatal attacks but still GOD spoke to me and said "My child, I still have plans for you." Since then, I have offered my voice, my songs to God and God alone.

I have learned what it means to be greatly blessed by a God-given talent and it made me believe in myself as much as God believes in me and now I sing for His glory and not mine. No more disappointments for I know I don't have to please anybody, only God.

"Our talents are God's gift to us and what we do with it is our gift back to God."

 I now sing to worship God, not to be worshipped by the world.,  I now wanted to become part of God's league of musicians, not the world's famous musicians. I want to be known as God's singer and not just a singer.

I will always love the ministry God has given me. Four years and counting! To God be all the glory and honor!